Kinda Chic to Raise a Family, Make Music, Tell Jokes and Thrive in Family Law for 30 Years

By Rebecca L. Palmer

30 years in business will teach you a few things. Among them: people are complicated, families are even more complicated, and things don’t always go according to plan.

30 years ago, I started practicing law with the ambition of building a courtroom career. I got my wish. Over the years, I have represented a wide range of clients through divorces, custody disputes, financial battles, and mediations during the most difficult chapters of their lives. I have been fortunate to be recognized by my peers, including being named to “The Best Lawyers in America” and the “Super Lawyers” list. I have also had the opportunity to teach at esteemed universities, share my expertise on news outlets and podcasts, publish articles and opinion pieces, and work on cases that captured national headlines.

But when I look back across three decades of practicing law, building a business, and being recognized for quality work, what I am most proud of are the relationships. The women I have encouraged, the young lawyers I have mentored, the clients who trusted me during some of the hardest moments of their lives, the organizations like Best Buddies and the events like Empowering Night of Laughter that I have been fortunate enough to support, and the colleagues who became lifelong friends. And, most importantly, my loving family, who has been there through it all.

I Am My Father’s Daughter

I grew up as a Presbyterian minister’s daughter, which meant I received a unique education in people long before law school. I learned early that everyone has a story and that you should listen before you judge. Sometimes people need someone to sit with them in the middle of their mess before they are ready to figure out what comes next.

I also learned that people are, well, people. They can be wonderful, frustrating, stubborn, hilarious, and occasionally all those things before breakfast. Those lessons have served me well in family law.

Family law isn’t only about parenting plans and judgments. It is about an individual’s relationships, fear, hope, money, children, reinvention, and figuring out how to move forward when the life you thought you were going to have has changed. My upbringing taught me to see the person behind the problem, and practicing family law taught me just how important that is.

The Art of Living a Full Life

In addition to loving the law. I love the arts. I’m a musician. I’m also a comedian.

Music and comedy have given me a creative outlet, something I believe every lawyer and every entrepreneur needs. Law is an exercise in problem-solving. Entrepreneurship is solving future problems and significantly more uncertainty. Both require you to think on your feet, see opportunities other people may not see, and occasionally improvise when the original plan has gone completely sideways.

Music reminds me that there is more than one way to hear a problem, and synchronicity can be found if you keep working at it. Comedy reinforces my confidence and illustrates with each performance that perspective matters. And both remind me not to take myself too seriously. Having a life outside of law has made me a better lawyer, a better business owner, and, I hope, a more well-rounded human being.

30 Years in Business Is a Team Sport

Building and sustaining a private practice has taught me another important lesson. Entrepreneurship is not an individual sport. There are the people who work beside you, people who believe in you before you’re entirely sure you believe in yourself, and the people who remind you that the world will continue to spin even if you don’t answer that email immediately or a judgment does not go your way.

My family has been my foundation throughout this journey. They are my roots. Having a supportive family has given me the freedom to take risks, build something of my own, try new things, fail occasionally, laugh frequently, and keep going. Entrepreneurship requires a certain amount of stubbornness, but it also requires people who will tell you when your stubbornness has crossed the line into foolishness. I have been very lucky to have those people.

Success Means Making Room

I have never believed success means simply getting ahead. To me, it means holding the door open for the women coming behind me.

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Throughout my career, I have tried to use whatever opportunities I have been given to create opportunities for other women. That has included leading organizations such as the Central Florida Association for Women Lawyers, teaching the next generation of lawyers, mentoring young professionals, and working alongside organizations committed to helping women find their voices, build their confidence, and create their own opportunities.

My community involvement, from serving on Orlando’s Art Advisory Board to supporting organizations that are making a difference in Orlando and beyond, has been an important part of that journey. In many ways, working with organizations that support women and strengthen my community has shaped my career and how I show up for other people. It has taught me that success is not just about what you accomplish for yourself; it is about what you do with the opportunities you have been given and the people you can help along the way. And if you happen to have a good chair at the table, scoot over.

The Privilege of Practicing Family Law

After 30 years, I don’t take the privilege of being a family lawyer for granted. I know that sounds sentimental coming from someone who has spent a significant portion of her career arguing about money, property, and parenting schedules, but it is true.

People include family lawyers in extraordinarily private and painful moments. They trust us with their fears, their finances, their children, and sometimes the pieces of their lives they haven’t even figured out how to say out loud yet. That is a tremendous responsibility, but it is also a tremendous privilege.

Over the years, my practice has evolved. I have learned that while litigation is sometimes necessary, it isn’t always the best answer. Sometimes the better outcome comes from negotiation, mediation, collaboration, and finding a way to resolve conflict without making the conflict bigger. Knowing when to fight and knowing when to find another path may be one of the most important lessons that years of family law experience can teach you.

A Full Life Is the Point

Looking back, a full life means a law practice I am deeply proud of. It means professional recognition, and watching young lawyers fall in love with the law. It means courtrooms and conference rooms, balanced by music, comedy, and creative outlets that remind me of the vibrant world outside the law. It means navigating serious conversations about custody and finances, followed by laughing with my friends and family until my stomach hurts.

30 years of entrepreneurship, community service, mentorship, performances, and lifelong friendships have taught me that true success is about connections. It’s a privilege to help other women find their voices and their footing, while continuing to learn from those generous enough to share their stories with me.

Most of all, after three decades, I can see how extraordinarily lucky I have been. Lucky to have built a career doing work that matters. Lucky to have an amazing, supportive family providing my roots. Lucky to belong to a community that has given me so much. Lucky to keep creative outlets that spark curiosity and keep me grounded. And lucky enough to know that being a great lawyer never required me to be only a lawyer.

I may be celebrating 30 years in business, but I truly believe the best is yet to come.

 

Attorney Rebecca L. Palmer, Esq., focuses on family and marital law and is the Managing Partner of The Rebecca L. Palmer Law Group. She may be reached at rebecca@rlplawgroup.com.