In a column published on 5/6 in the Daily Business Review, family law attorney Rebecca Palmer writes that separated or divorced parents must put aside their differences to ensure that their shared child enjoys a celebratory graduation. Planning ahead for the child’s graduation and their first steps into adulthood must commence long before they walk across the stage. Accordingly, a divorce decree might include such stipulations as when child support obligations will cease, and Palmer also advises spelling out precisely how each parent will contribute to their child’s post-secondary education.

“Such clarity can prevent potential disputes and ensure that both parents are on the same page regarding financial responsibilities as your child transitions into adulthood,” writes Palmer. “If your children are still young, this may seem unnecessary now but thinking about the future details of a legal agreement at least provides a framework for later financial planning—and reduces the likelihood of disagreements arising when your child is ready to pursue higher education.”

When it comes to the graduation ceremony itself, Palmer says that the co-parents must communicate with one another well in advance concerning such logistics as who will attend, the seating arrangements, and potential joint gatherings before or afterwards. Above all, co-parents must put the needs of their shared child first and foremost, offering a united front to celebrate this big milestone.

“By consciously shifting your focus away from negative feelings about your ex and redirecting it towards celebrating your child’s accomplishments, you are creating an environment where their achievements take center stage instead of your past drama,” writes Palmer. “The most meaningful way to honor your child’s hard work and celebrate their future is to create a positive, loving day, ensuring they feel cherished and supported as they embark on a new chapter.”

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